Arg.

Sometimes I get so frustrated with myself, I just want to shake myself until I give myself the wake up call I can't seem to get through my head. Yes, this has to do with my budget. Which I did not follow. Again. Seriously, folks. I don't know why I do what I do and why I can't stop myself. I did not spend as much this check than I did in the last, but I still spent over what I wanted to. Grrrrrr.

I know I love the rush I get from shopping. I love the process of picking things out, whether they are second hand or brand new. I love owning something new. Why? When I have no where set up to put it? I wish I was organized. I wish I could look at things and say, "I'll buy that when I have a spot for it." or "I don't have a specific spot, so I can't buy it." Instead I say, "What if they sell out and I don't have it when I need it?" Like it's life or death.

I need to replace shopping. I need to sew. Or crochet. Or scrapbook (as my sister has been trying to get me to do). Or read. Or watch my television. Or, at this point, sleep. I'm good at sleeping! I need to do something that gives me the same rush as shopping.

Tonight I stayed home and made noodles for dinner (and lunch for the next couple of days). I played on the internet and I watched Little House on the Prairie. I even finished my book ("The Last Olympian" By Rick Riordan. Read it. Love it. The entire series is fabulous). It may not be a very productive day, but it's much better than spending money I should be doing something else with.

I have been purging. I mentioned I went through my books a couple weeks ago and took books off my shelf I know I won't read. The last couple days I have been bringing them to work for our "library" (we call it that, but it's a take a book and keep it if you'd like to, we could care less kind of library). I brought 6 in yesterday, 12 today, and the last of it I will bring in tomorrow, which looks to be about 12. Most are fiction crime type novels, so I know they'll get read. A couple are animal. Even if they sit there for months, they won't be hated as much as the complete collection of Danielle Steele novels taking up most of the shelf space someone got rid of a year ago (and there they sit collecting dust...bad taste anyone?)

My mother did some purging of her own this past weekend, which is awesome. She was going through some stuff looking for photos and my sister gave her a box and told her to put stuff aside if she comes across something she didn't want. She came up with like four boxes full of stuff to get rid of. And all without my prompting! I'm so proud of them! Seriously. It's hard for my family to get rid of anything (yes, even the books I'm never going to read is hard to pass on, even when I know someone will read them).

What prompted this post was I worked on my budget. I think this weekend I'm going to work on it more, since Friday is a payday. I need to give myself rewards. Such as when I get this one thing paid off, or this much saved, I'll do this (such as treat myself to a fairly expensive item I can't justify...I know it's not supposed to work that way, but maybe if I have it written down and I see it's attainable, the more I want it, the faster I'll pay it off instead of buying small stuff I don't really need). I'll come up with something.

In any case, it's time for bed.